Most times, if you ask, I’d tell you that the reason that most of my blogging is musically oriented is because I often believe that I don’t have much to say. Sights, sounds, work, life and
love around me are pretty straightforward. Some people might tell you I’m
a mellow kinda cat, and for the most part I’d like to believe that’s true. You
can even hear me a referred to as listener instead of a speaker. Every so often I have cause
to reflect on how good life is, as I’m sure you do. I don’t express myself that
often because most of the time there’s other people around me with a whole lot more to
say, and I just enjoy listening, hearing, vibing, being. That’s my thing. I’m
sure you feel me, right?
Well, the last couple of weeks were a little different if you didn’t get that
from the vibe all around. While the headaches were a warning sign, I kept going, until I was literally out, as in unconscious, for 48 hours,
after having that grand
mal seizure. Seems that Thursday and Friday from week before last, they
poked and prodded and tried to find out what was goin’ on inside my head. Literally.
Apparently when I was awake I wasn’t happy about the IV equipment (and from
what I understand, I was trying to take it out of my arm), the fact that my computer
wasn’t near me, and most of all, I couldn’t listen to music or find
interesting television. Of course, when work calls you on the weekend while
you’re lying down on the hospital bed and you’re telling ’em you will be working
from home for a little bit because of this seizure, you get a lot of support-
even when the
workaholic worker in you is trying to find a way to make
up for these hours on your unwanted vacation, or figuring out what’s gonna be
on your next Old School Wednesday, or In Rotation, or what you’re gonna have
on Flickr, because life is not supposed to stop…just like I’m not supposed to stop!
You also get a chance to find out that some people are actually are reading
what you’ve got to say- which isn’t much because, ultimately, you’re trying
to get through these life situations behind and continue forward. What you don’t
expect is that there are comments waiting, IMs, emails, phone messages
and the most unexpected of all, music, plants and flowers. I can name one- and only one- dissapointment
that I had while I was laid up. While that one person may or not be contacted,
I can honestly say that this has shown me that I’ve got way more friends than I’ve ever imagined, that
I don’t regret walking through my blogs everyday even though I constantly believe that I’m insanely behind,
because I still get to see and vibe through things on the web every day that pale in comparison to what one book could show me.
In short, I really do want to thank those that have reached out and said something,
have knocked me across the head with love, and have kept me up and carrying
on, because even though I’m sure I’m behind in a lot of things, there’s quite
a few of you who know how to nudge me along and keep me moving, even though I’m convinced I haven’t even moved a muscle.
What I’m sayin’ is- there’s love out there especially to you. If I haven’t specifically said so, know that it’s definitely my head and not my heart and I have every intention of giving
you the same appreciation you’ve given me.
Thank y’all for showing love to me. In fact, I’ve
been feeling so good about it, I don’t believe I’ve even expressed myself vocally enough.
Leave me an email, comment, whatever, if I haven’t. We’ll exchange phone numbers, whatever you
want. I’ve got love for you even if you can’t see it.
And that’s the truth. Forreal.